Do you ever get annoyed at yourself? At the way things are?
I’ve been in a weird space lately. Good weird though.. I think. Hah I guess we’ll see soon enough… it feels like I’ve upgraded, or refined my perspectives and the vision I have for what I’m wanting to do and be is becoming clearer by the day.. which is awesome, but at the same time it’s like my current systems and routines haven’t upgraded and can’t keep up with what I want/need them to do.
Feeling like a last generation iPhone that hasn’t been updated in forever and it takes 10seconds to open an app and by the time the app opens, I already need the next one to do the next thing on the list…
the lag is real..
Basically, I’ve outgrown some of my current way of doing things; current thought processes, routines and habits and I’m getting hōhā (frustrated) because nothing works the way it’s supposed to (the way I’m used to) anymore and it feels uncomfortable, annoying and also confronting, because I’m also being smacked in the face (metaphorically) with how inefficient, basic, amateur and ineffective some of my systems are… so what am I gonna do?
Stay frustrated and annoyed? Have a haka with reality about how things should be? Lol or maybe do something about it and take ownership.. maybe improve my systems, develop new habits and level up? Could even extend myself beyond my current parameters/comfort zone and grow…
what a novel idea….
That phase of Te Pō (creation phase, the unknown, darkness), just after Uepoto experienced space beyond his parents and before Tāne (atua of the forest, light) separated them, comes to mind. That wānanga back and forth about what te ira atua (the gods) might do; should they stick with the status quo and carry on business as usual, in Te Pō? I mean, at least it was familiar in there and they’re used to it. There' was only one problem though, there never used to be an alternative.
The atua didn’t know there was anything more than the space between their parents, Ranginui and Papatuanuku, Heaven and Earth, the astral and physical realms. Not until Uepoto’s adventures and findings stretched the minds of his siblings so much that they could not go back to their old dimensions - they couldn’t accept the state of things now that they knew there was another possibility, another option available to them.
Consequently, Rangi and Papa were separated and here we are, in Te Ao Mārama (the world of light). But I always think, how important was that phase, in Te Pō? That phase of wānanga, that restlessness, that frustration, that discomfort to remain in the comfort zone and discontent to stay the same when they knew there was now a whole other world waiting to be explored?
That confinement between their parents prepared te ira atua for what came next,
it developed the capacity within each of them to grow, to be curious, to demand more from life and from themselves - it was the catalyst required to realise their potential.
What phase are you in? What is it preparing you for?