get yourself back, win your own heart
With that downpour we had last night in Rotorua, the whenua will be nice and hydrated to nurture new seeds and new life over the coming months.. what a perfect gift for Christmas from the taiao (in addition to everything else it does to sustain and nurture us) and in between the clouds, maybe you got a peep in at Whiro, the new moon.
So, we’ve come to the end of covering Hinenuitepō (atua of death, darkness), death and rebirth, reinterpreting endings/death/beginnings/birth and hands down, this has been one of my favourite cycles to write about. Maybe because it’s been an outlet for wānanga that’s been weighing on me lately and trying to articulate it into a post has helped me make sense of my own thoughts… all the posts do that, but this has been particularly healing for me
— thanks for being part of it.
I’ve been taking stock and have reflected on how some phases in my life have come to an end, some are just beginning, some are halfway through and may need to be course-corrected and some are yet to begin. All are natural and all serve their purpose. What I’ve probably learned the most in this reflection has been how negligent I’ve been to myself, spiritually.
Just not taking proper care and doing the things that get the best out of me, you know?
But reminding myself that different phases have different phases, letting die what must die and creating the space to deconstruct everything i.e. slowing down and saying no more, has allowed new life to flow. I’ve missed this feeling. The feeling of getting myself back — something of a rebirth?
It hasn’t been without it’s challenges, mamae (hurt/pain) nor should I give you the impression that it’s over….. of course it’s continuous work, but there are cycles, stages of growth. And getting to this point in time in my life has meant a lot of deconstructing, stripping away and rebuilding. From job opportunities, to kaupapa (causes/projects) I’m apart of, to relationships.. they’ve undergone their own cycles of birth, death and rebirth in some way.
And what a coincidence that wrapping up this kōrero on Hinenuitepō and death/rebirth, lines up with the moon phases and also the end of 2019? Haha how about that.. we’ll introduce the new atua for the series in the new year.
Ngā manaakitanga,
Hana.